Ladies, are you tired of being cheated on every month? Want a boyfriend who doesn’t act like a chauvinist or put you down in front of his friends? Fed up with guys who think his sports team is more important than his relationship with you? Fear not, I have a solution.
Date a nerd/geek/gamer.
Why? Well, because while the majority of them may not be muscle-bound, pretty-boy “hunks” (if you’re even into that sort of thing), they have a cornucopia of great traits that make them more than worthy boyfriend material. Check it out:
1. They are intelligent.
Geeks tend to have a few well-loved subjects that they are experts in, but most will be informed on nearly any real topic under the sun. You want a man who can have a deep philosophical conversation with you, or one who is up to date on the latest scientific advancements? There you go. Sure beats having to listen about how the current football season is going again…and again…and again. Trust me, a partner who is willing to flex his smarts is sexy. Knowledge is power, after all.
2. They are genuine.
Women get a lot of flak for playing head games constantly, but a fair share of men do it too, especially those who are players or jerks. Geeks and nerds are a breath of fresh air in this case, as they usually opt for complete honesty and truthfulness. You want to be kept in the loop of what your man is thinking, or don’t want a runaround if an outfit really *does* look hideous on you? Well, you asked…and your nerd will tell you the truth. Just be aware that there will probably be no sugar-coating of it, so don’t get angry for him being “too direct”.
3. They are motivated.
Most, if not all, geeks and nerds have a strong drive for success. Whether this motivation plays out in his hobbies, relationships, or job is dependent on the individual man, but be assured that he has a ton of willpower to get things done. Sometimes this can be redirected temporarily; if he’s very into his job, and you feel left out, tell him in a clear and non-blaming manner. He will do his best to redistribute his time, and help revamp the relationship. Just remember that it takes 2 to tango…you need to show *your* desire to help too.
4. They’re romantic.
Are you the type of woman who likes men who pull out your chair, present you with a single rose on your first date, or who will drape their cloak over you if there’s a chill in the air? Then what the hell are you doing trying to find guys at bars? You should be looking at your FLGS* or at LARPing* events! Seriously, the overwhelming majority of gamers have a strong romantic streak in them, and they are sincere about it. They will treat you like a real lady, not because they think you’re fragile or inferior, but because they honestly care about making you feel special. If you even attempt to match this in your own way…by being pleasant, buying him a gift every once in a while, and thanking him for the little things he does…you will have a long and healthy relationship.
5. They’re empathetic.
Alright ladies, serious question time. Do you or don’t you want a man who cares about your problems and will listen to you when you’re upset? Because if you *do*, a nerd or geek is for you. If not, go back to chasing the jerk from the club who never calls you back. I’m sure this comes as a shock to no one, but gamers, nerds, and geeks have almost always had a hard time growing up. Most had to deal with bitchy girls who used them for homework duty, and alpha/jock guys who slammed them into lockers. They know what it’s like to be upset, and thus have a better listening ear than someone who coasted through the social drama of high school and college. Be aware though: They will listen, but then offer solutions to the issue. If you don’t want to fix the problem, let them know ahead of time.
6. They’re imaginative.
Do you like role-playing games? Because you’re bound to get some with one of these guys. I’ve found, through personal experience, that creativity in ones hobbies/workplace translates very well into the bedroom. I’m not necessarily talking about having crazy-hanging-from-a-chandelier sex (though he probably wouldn’t say no), I just mean you will never be bored. If there’s one thing a gamer boyfriend is not, it’s a “one-hump chump”. True, he may not have much real life experience, but remember, we were all like that once. If you go slow at first, you will in all probability find a bastion of sexual imagination who is likely to enjoy the concept of equal pleasure and foreplay just as much as you. Unless of course you’re actually into men who only use you for their own jollies and don’t care if you are satisfied with the encounter…then by all means, keep after that jerk from the bar. There might just be a reason why women report having fewer orgasms with random hookups who couldn’t care less if they get off too.
There are more reasons that geeks and nerds make good boyfriends (and husbands), but how many do you really need? True, you will have to “put up with” them going to Comic Con, PAX, Gencon, and their gaming store. They may have elaborate costumes or real broadswords for the Renaissance Faire. You may have to read Lord of the Rings or a D&D manual to understand certain conversations. But if that is the worst that you have to deal with, I can think of far more horrible relationship sacrifices. Attraction isn’t something one can control, but it may just be worth it to look around for that geeky diamond in the rough. Who knows, you might be pleasantly surprised.
My people are awesome once you give them a chance. 😉
*FLGS = Friendly Local Gaming Store
*LARPing = Live Action Role Playing