Love is True, perhaps the only emotion that actually can be. It is not able to be bought, traded, or sold no matter how much people may wish it to be so. It is the feeling of wanting to give more than you receive, and not caring to keep score.
Love is what is left over when you are no longer “in love”. When the animal lust and bodily desire cease to be the entire driving force behind your companionship, yet you still wish to be together, that is love. The entanglement of fates rather than bodies…so often, people confuse the sudden volcanic eruption of hormones and chemicals of lust with the steady ebb and flow of love.
Love is the need to make one’s partner happy, indeed, happier than they have ever been before. It is a soft kiss as you part ways, it is a single caress as you walk by them, it is an embrace that lasts just a moment longer before ending. It is the giving of pleasure in tiny amounts throughout the day. For love, while not ravenous, should yet receive many small tidbits in between meals lest it grow strained and famished. A single flower left upon the bed, a favorite dinner prepared to perfection, an inexpensive but meaningful gift concealed in a coat pocket or bag lunch, to be found at an unexpected time. It is sending the children to a relative for the weekend so your intimacy can be rekindled, it is waking your partner with pleasurable touches and strokes..these are the foods that makes love thrive, not the empty meals that Hallmark or society deem worthy of celebration.
Love is becoming vulnerable to someone, and asking them for their vulnerability in return. It is when you care for another so much that you approach them, naked of armor, and ask for acceptance as you are. There is no deeper pain than that of unrequited love, and no better relief than love returned. Be careful to not give your love to one who has none for you…that path leads to pain and abuse, or at least a life of being taken advantage of. Know that you cannot change others, nor should you try.
There is no such thing as love at first sight. There is lust, care for another, and chemical attraction certainly…but love is a garden that requires tending. It cannot arise overnight, or in a single moment. This is merely the planting of a seed, one that still has needs that will allow it to flourish and grow. I fear too many people forget this, and are surprised when they find their unattended love covered with choking vines and weeds.
Love is being so in tune with another that the room feels empty without them, when even a solitary activity like reading or drawing is improved by their simple presence. It is not making oneself inferior or superior to one’s partner, but instead recognizing them as a being equal to yourself, albeit different. It is learning to live, either temporarily or permanently, with a fellow person who has their own dreams, goals, desires…and accepting them as your own. Of course, they will do the same for you, which makes one’s life exciting but in a more stable way. Love is sharing a life so completely that you’d lay down your own to ensure that their own goes on, and knowing they’d do the same for you.
Love is not finding your missing piece or your other half. You should never seek without what is not partially within. Love demands that you give yourself, as a complete adult, to it. Attempting to use the name of love to find someone to complete yourself can only end in tragedy and resentment. Love is offering yourself…all of your beautifully flawed and talented self…to another, and having them joyously accept you as is.
This is how I feel about the concept of love, or at least what I can put into words. How about you, dear reader? What would you add?